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  gotten it all wrong�察�that their ^good ̄ news was that they were 
  building a newer�察�bigger Home in that swamp they lived in�察�or that 
  Kyle had finally decided to leave his father¨s law firm and was 
  going to join my sister in opening the gallery she¨d always dreamed 
  of。 Maybe we¨d jumped the gun on this one�察�been just a little too 
  eager to hear that a future niece or grandson was on the way。 It was 
  all my parents could talk about lately�察�incessantly hashing and 
  rehashing the reasons why my sister and Kyle!already in their 
  thirties and with four years of marriage behind them!had yet to 
  reproduce。 In the past six months�察�the subject had progressed from 
  time´consuming family obsession to perceived crisis。

  My sister looked worried。 Kyle frowned。 My parents looked as though 
  they might both pass out from the silence。 The tension was palpable。

  Jill got out of her chair and walked over to Kyle�察�where she plopped 
  herself in his lap。 She wrapped her arm behind the back of his neck 
  and leaned her face next to his�察�whispering in his ear。 I glanced at 
  my mother�察�who looked about ten seconds away from unconsciousness�察�
  the worry causing the small lines near her eyes to grow as deep as 
  trenches。

  Finally�察�finally�察�they giggled�察�and turned toward the table�察�and 
  announced unanimously�察 �We¨re going to have a baby。 ̄ And then there 
  was light。 And shrieking。 And hugging。 My mother flew out of her 
  seat so fast that she knocked it over and�察�in turn�察�tipped over a 
  potted cactus that rested by the sliding´glass door。 My dad grabbed 
  Jill and kissed her on both cheeks and the top of her head�察�and for 
  the first time I could remember since their wedding day�察�he kissed 
  Kyle�察�too。

  I rapped my Dr。 Brown¨s black cherry can with a plastic fork and 
  announced that we needed a toast。 ^Please raise your glasses�察�
  everyone�察�raise your glasses to the brand´new Sachs baby that will 
  be joining our family。 ̄ Kyle and Jill looked at me pointedly。 ^OK�察�I 
  guess technically it¨s a Harrison baby�察�but it will be a Sachs at 
  heart。 To Kyle and Jill�察�future perfect parents to the world¨s most 
  perfect child。 ̄ We all clinked soda cans and coffee mugs and toasted 
  the grinning couple and my sister¨s twenty´four´inch waist。 I 
  cleaned up by throwing the entire contents of the table directly 
  into a garbage bag while my mom tried to pressure Jill to name the 
  baby after various dead relatives。 Kyle sipped Coffee and looked 
  pleased with himself�察�and just before midnight my dad and I sneaked 
  off to his study for a game。

  He turned up the white´noise machine he used when he had patients 
  during the day�察�both to block out the sounds of the household from 
  them and to keep anyone else in the house from hearing what was 
  discussed in his office。 Like any good shrink�察�my dad had placed a 
  gray leather couch in the far corner�察�so soft I liked to rest my 
  head on the armrest�察�and three chairs that angled forward and held a 
  person in a kind of fabric sling。 Womblike�察�he assured me。 His desk 
  was sleek and black and topped with a flat´screen monitor�察�and the 
  matching black leather chair was high´backed and very plush。 A wall 
  of psychology books encased in glass�察�a collection of bamboo stalks 
  in a very tall crystal vase on the floor�察�and some framed colorblock 
  prints!the only real color in the room!pleted the futuristic 
  look。 I flopped on the floor between the couch and his desk�察�and he 
  did the same。

  ^So�察�tell me what¨s really going on�察�Andy�察院�he said as he handed me 
  a little wooden tile holder。 ^I¨m sure you¨re feeling really 
  overwhelmed right now。 ̄

  I picked my seven tiles and carefully arranged them in front of me。 
  ^Yeah�察�it¨s been a pretty crazy couple weeks。 First moving�察�then 
  starting。 It¨s a weird place�察�hard to explain。 It¨s like�察�everyone¨s 
  beautiful and thin and wearing gorgeous clothes。 And they really do 
  seem nice enough!everybody¨s been really friendly。 Almost like 
  they¨re all on serious prescription drugs。 I don¨t know 。 。 。 ̄

  ^What�拭�What were you going to say�拭�

  ^I can¨t put my finger on it。 There¨s just this feeling that it¨s 
  all a house of cards that¨s going to e crashing down around me。 I 
  can¨t shake the feeling that it¨s ridiculous to be working for 
  afashion magazine�察�you know�拭�The work¨s been a little mindless so 
  far�察�but I don¨t even care。 It¨s challenging enough because it¨s all 
  new�察�you know�拭�

  He nodded。

  ^I know it¨s a `cool¨ job�察�but I keep wondering how it¨s preparing 
  me forThe New Yorker 。 I must just be looking for something to go 
  wrong�察�because so far it seems too good to be true。 Hopefully�察�I¨m 
  just crazy。 ̄

  ^I don¨t think you¨re crazy�察�sweetie。 I think you¨re sensitive。 But 
  I have to agree�察�I think you lucked out with this one。 People go 
  their entire lives and don¨t see the things you¨ll see this year。 
  Just think� �Your first job out of college�察�and you¨re working for 
  the most important woman at the most profitable magazine at the 
  biggest magazine publishing pany in the entire world。 You¨ll get 
  to watch it all happen�察�from the top down。 If you just keep your 
  eyes open and your priorities in order�察�you¨ll learn more in one 
  year than most people in the industry will see in their entire 
  careers。 ̄ He placed his first word in the middle of the board�察�JOLT。

  ^Not bad for an opening move�察院�I said and counted its worth�察�doubled 
  it because the first word always went on a pink star�察�and started a 
  scorecard。 Dad�此�22 points�察�Andy�此�0。 My letters weren¨t showing much 
  promise。 I added an A�察�M�察�and E to the L and accepted my paltry six 
  points。

  ^I just want to make sure you give it a fair shake�察院�he said�察�
  switching his tiles around on his holder。 ^The more I think about 
  it�察�the more I¨m convinced this is going to mean big things for 
  you。 ̄

  ^Well�察�I sure hope you¨re right�察�because I have enough paper cuts 
  from wrapping to last a long�察�long time。 There better be more to the 
  whole thing than that。 ̄

  ^There will be�察�sweetie�察�there will be。 You¨ll see。 It might feel 
  like you¨re doing silly stuff�察�but trust me�察�you¨re not。 This is the 
  start of something fantastic�察�I can feel it。 And I¨ve studied up on 
  your boss。 This Miranda sounds like a tough woman�察�no doubt about 
  it�察�but I think you¨re going to like her。 And I think she¨s going to 
  like you�察�too。 ̄

  He placed the word TOWEL down using my E and looked satisfied。

  ^I hope you¨re right�察�Dad。 I really hope you¨re right。 ̄

  ^She¨s the editor in chief ofRunway !you know�察�the fashion 
  magazine�拭院�I whispered urgently into the phone�察�trying valiantly not 
  to get frustrated。

  ^Oh�察�I know which one you mean� 院�said Julia�察�a publicity assistant 
  for Scholastic Books。 ^Great magazine。 I love all those letters 
  where girls write in their embarrassing period stories。 Are those 
  for real�拭�Do you remember reading the one where! ̄

  ^No�察�no�察�not the one for teenagers。 It¨s most definitely for grown 
  women。 ̄ In theory�察�at least。 ^Have you really never seenRunway �拭�Is 
  it humanly possible that she hasn¨t�拭�I wondered。 ^Anyway�察�it¨s 
  spelled P´R´I´E´S´T´L´Y。 Miranda�察�yes�察院�I said with infinite 
  patience。 I wondered how she¨d react if she knew I actually had 
  someone on the line who¨d never heard of her。 Probably not well。

  ^Well�察�if you could get back to me as soon as possible�察�I¨dreally 
  appreciate it�察院�I told Julia。 ^And if a senior publicist gets in 
  anytime soon��please have her call me。 ̄

  It was a Friday morning in the middle of December and the sweet�察�
  sweet freedom of the weekend was only ten hours away。 I had been 
  trying to convince a fashion´oblivious Julia at Scholastic that 
  Miranda Priestly really was someone important�察�someone worth bending 
  rules and suspending logic for。 This proved significantly more 
  difficult than I had anticipated。 How could I have known that I¨d 
  have to explain the weight of Miranda¨s position to influence 
  someone who¨d never even heard of the most prestigious fashion 
  magazine on earth!or its famous editor�拭�In my four short weeks as 
  Miranda¨s assistant�察�I¨d already figured out that such 
  weight´throwing and favor´currying was merely part of my job�察�but 
  usually the person I was attempting to persuade�察�intimidate�察�or 
  otherwise pressure yielded pletely at the mere mention of my 
  infamous boss¨s name。

  Unfortunately for me�察�Julia worked for an educational publishing 
  house where someone like Nora Ephron or Wendy Wasserstein was much 
  likelier to get VIP treatment than someone known for her impeccable 
  taste in fur。 I inherently understood this。 I tried to remember all 
  the way back to a time before I had ever heard of Miranda 
  Priestly!five weeks earlier!and couldn¨t。 But I knew that such a 
  magical time had existed。 I envied Julia¨s indifference�察�but I had a 
  job to do�察�and she wasn¨t helping。

  The fourth book in that wretched Harry Potter series was due to be 
  released the next day�察�a Saturday�察�and Miranda¨s ten´year´old twin 
  daughters each wanted one。 The first copies wouldn¨t arrive in 
  stores until Monday�察�but I had to have them in my hands on Saturday 
  morning!mere minutes after they were released from the warehouse。 
  After all�察�Harry and the crew had to catch a private flight to 
  Paris。

  My thoughts were interrupted by the phone。 I picked it up as I 
  always did now that Emily trusted me enough to speak to Miranda。 And 
  boy�察�did we speak!probably in the vicinity of two dozen times a day。 
  Even from afar�察�Miranda had managed to creep into my life and 
  pletely take over�察�barking orders and requests and demands at a 
  rapid´fire pace from sevenA 。M。 until I was finally allowed to leave 
  at nineP 。M。

  ^Ahn´dre´ah�拭�Hello�拭�Is anyone there�拭�Ahn´dre´ah� 院�I jumped out of my 
  seat the moment I heard her pronounce my name。 It took a moment to 
  remember and accept that she was not�察�in fact�察�in the office!or even 
  in the country�察�and for the time being�察�at least�察�I was safe。 Emily 
  had assured me that Miranda was pletely unaware that Allison had 
  been promoted or I had been hired�察�that these were insignificant 
  details lost on her。 As long as someone answered the phone and got 
  her what she needed�察�that person¨s actual identity was irrelevent。

  ^I simply do not understand what takes you so long to speak after 
  you pick up the phone�察院�she stated。 From any other person on earth 
  that would have sounded whiny�察�but from Miranda it sounded 
  appropriately cold and firm。 Just like her。 ^In case you haven¨t 
  been here long enough to notice�察�when I call�察�you respond。 It¨s 
  actually simple。 See�拭�I call。 You respond。 Do you think you can 
  handle that�察�Ahn´dre´ah�拭�

  I nodded like a six´year´old who¨d just been reprimanded for 
  throwing spaghetti on the ceiling�察�even though she couldn¨t see me。 
  I concentrated on not calling her ^ma¨am�察院�a mistake I¨d made a week 
  earlier that had almost gotten me fired。 ^Yes�察�Miranda。 I¨m sorry�察院�
  I said softly�察�head bowed。 And for that moment Iwas sorry�察�sorry 
  that her words hadn¨t registered in my brain three´tenths of a 
  second faster than they had�察�sorry that my tardiness in saying 
  ^Miranda Priestly¨s office ̄ had taken a fraction of a second longer 
  than absolutely necessary。 Her time was�察�as I was constantly 
  reminded�察�much more important than my own。

  ^All right then。 Now�察�after wasting all that time�察�may we begin�拭�Did 
  you confirm Mr。 Tomlinson¨s reservation�拭院�she asked。

  ^Yes�察�Miranda�察�I made a reservation for Mr。 Tomlinson at the Four 
  Seasons at one o¨clock。 ̄

  I could see it ing a mile away。 A mere ten minutes earlier she¨d 
  called and ordered me to make a reservation at the Four Seasons and 
  call Mr。 Tomlinson and her driver and the nanny to inform them of 
  the plans�察�and now she¨d want to rearrange them。

  ^Well�察�I¨ve changed my mind。 The Four Seasons is not the appropriate 
  venue for his lunch with Irv。 Reserve a table for two at Le Cirque�察�
  and remember to remind the maî��tre d¨ that they will want to sit in 
  theback of the restaurant。 Not on display in the front。The back 。 
  That¨s all。 ̄

  I had convinced myself when I first spoke with Miranda on the phone�察�
  that by uttering ^that¨s all�察院�she really intended those words to 
  mean ^thank you。 ̄ By the second week I¨d rethought that。

  ^Of course�察�Miranda。Thank you�察 院�I said with a smile。 I could sense 
  her pausing
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