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；happy；andbeloved；webelieve；likeajax；weshallbeabletoescapeeverystorminspiteofthegods。butlaterinlife；whenthebackisbowed；whenhappinessprovesafadingflower；andtheaffectionsgrowchill…then；infearofthevoidandthedarkness；westretchoutourarms；likethechildovertakenbynight；andwecallforhelptohimwhoiseverywhere。
iwasaskingthismorningwhythisgrowingconfusionalikeforsocietyandfortheindividual？invaindoeshumanreasonfromhourtohourlightsomenewtorchontheroadside：thenightcontinuestogroweverdarker！isitnotbecausewearecontenttowithdrawfartherandfartherfromgod；thesunofspirits？
butwhatdothesehermitsreveriessignifytotheworld？theinwardturmoilsofmostmenarestifledbytheoutwardones；lifedoesnotgivethemtimetoquestionthemselves。havetheytimetoknowwhattheyare；andwhattheyshouldbe；whosewholethoughtsareinthenextleaseorthelastpriceofstock？heavenisveryhigh；andwisemenlookonlyattheearth。
buti鈥斺�攑oorsavageamidallthiscivilization；whoseekneitherpowernorriches；andwhohavefoundinmyownthoughtsthehomeandshelterofmyspirit鈥斺�攊cangobackwithimpunitytotheserecollectionsofmychildhood；and；ifthisourgreatcitynolongerhonorsthenameofgodwithafestival；iwillstrivestilltokeepthefeasttohiminmyheart。
CHAPTER VII
thepriceofpowerandtheworthoffame
sunday；july1st。
yesterdaythemonthdedicatedtojuno（junius；june）bytheromansended。
to…dayweenteronjuly。
inancientromethislattermonthwascalledquintiles（thefifth）；becausetheyear；whichwasthendividedintoonlytenparts；beganinmarch。whennumapompiliusdivideditintotwelvemonthsthisnameofquintileswaspreserved；aswellasthosethatfollowed鈥斺�攕exteles；september；october；november；december鈥斺�攁lthoughthesedesignationsdidnotaccordwiththenewlyarrangedorderofthemonths。atlast；afteratimethemonthquintiles；inwhichjuliuscaesarwasborn；wascalledjulius；whencewehavejuly。thusthisname；placedinthecalendar；isbeetheimperishablerecordofagreatman；itisanimmortalepitaphontimeshighway；engravedbytheadmirationofman。
howmanysimilarinscriptionsarethere！seas；continents；mountains；stars；andmonuments；haveallinsuccessionservedthesamepurpose！wehaveturnedthewholeworldintoagoldenbook；likethatinwhichthestateofveniceusedtoenrollitsillustriousnamesanditsgreatdeeds。
itseemsthatmankindfeelsanecessityforhonoringitselfinitselectones；andthatitraisesitselfinitsowneyesbychoosingheroesfromamongitsownrace。thehumanfamilylovetopreservethememory；oftheparvenusofglory；aswecherishthatofagreatancestor；orofabenefactor。
infact；thetalentsgrantedtoasingleindividualdonotbenefithimselfalone；butaregiftstotheworld；everyonesharesthem；foreveryonesuffersorbenefitsbyhisactions。geniusisalighthouse；meanttogivelightfromafar；themanwhobearsitisbuttherockuponwhichthislighthouseisbuilt。
ilovetodwelluponthesethoughts；theyexplaintomeinwhatconsistsouradmirationforglory。whengloryhasbenefitedmen；thatadmirationisgratitude；whenitisonlyremarkableinitself；itistheprideofrace；asmen；welovetoimmortalizethemostshiningexamplesofhumanity。
whoknowswhetherwedonotobeythesameinstinctinsubmittingtothehandofpower？apartfromtherequirementsofagradationofranks；ortheconsequencesofaconquest；themultitudedelighttosurroundtheirchiefswithprivileges鈥斺�攚hetheritbethattheirvanitymakesthemthustoaggrandizeoneoftheirowncreations；orwhethertheytrytoconcealthehumiliationofsubjectionbyexaggeratingtheimportanceofthosewhorulethem。theywishtohonorthemselvesthroughtheirmaster；theyelevatehimontheirshouldersasonapedestal；theysurroundhimwithahalooflight；inorderthatsomeofitmaybereflecteduponthemselves。
itisstillthefableofthedogwhocontentshimselfwiththechainandcollar；sothattheyareofgold。
thisservilevanityisnotlessnaturalorlessmonthanthevanityofdominion。whoeverfeelshimselfincapableofmand；atleastdesirestoobeyapowerfulchief。serfshavebeenknowntoconsiderthemselvesdishonoredwhentheybecamethepropertyofamerecountafterhavingbeenthatofaprince；andsaint…simonmentionsavaletwhowouldonlywaituponmarquises。
july7th；sevenoclockp。m鈥斺�攊havejustnowbeenuptheboulevards；itwastheoperanight；andtherewasacrowdofcarriagesintheruelepelletier。thefoot…passengerswhowerestoppedatacrossingrecognizedthepersonsinsomeoftheseaswewentby；andmentionedtheirnames；theywerethoseofcelebratedorpowerfulmen；thesuccessfulonesoftheday。
nearmetherewasamanlookingonwithhollowcheeksandeagereyes；whosethinblackcoatwasthreadbare。hefollowedwithenviouslooksthesepossessorsoftheprivilegesofpoweroroffame；andireadonhislips；whichcurledwithabittersmile；allthatpassedinhismind。
〃lookatthem；theluckyfellows！〃thoughthe；〃allthepleasuresofwealth；alltheenjoymentsofpride；aretheirs。theirnamesarerenowned；alltheirwishesfulfilled；theyarethesovereignsoftheworld；eitherbytheirintellectortheirpower；andwhilei；poorandunknown；toilpainfullyalongtheroadbelow；theywingtheirwayoverthemountain…topsgildedbythebroadsunshineofprosperity。〃
ihaveehomeindeepthought。isittruethattherearetheseinequalities；idonotsayinthefortunes；butinthehappinessofmen？
dogeniusandauthorityreallywearlifeasacrown；whilethegreaterpartofmankindreceiveitasayoke？isthedifferenceofrankbutadifferentuseofmensdispositionsandtalents；orarealinequalityintheirdestinies？asolemnquestion；asitregardstheverificationofgodsimpartiality。
july8th；noon鈥斺�攊wentthismorningtocalluponafriendfromthesameprovinceasmyself；whoisthefirstusher…in…waitingtooneofourministers。itookhimsomelettersfromhisfamily；leftforhimbyatravellerjustefrombrittany。hewishedmetostay。
〃to…day；〃saidhe；〃theministergivesnoaudience：hetakesadayofrestwithhisfamily。hisyoungersistersarearrived；hewilltakethemthismorningtost。cloud；andintheeveninghehasinvitedhisfriendstoaprivateball。ishallbedismisseddirectlyfortherestoftheday。wecandinetogether；readthenewswhileyouarewaitingforme。〃
isatdownatatablecoveredwithnewspapers；allofwhichilookedoverbyturns。mostofthemcontainedseverecriticismsonthelastpoliticalactsoftheminister；someofthemaddedsuspicionsastothehonoroftheministerhimself。
justasihadfinishedreading；asecretarycameforthemtotakethemtohismaster。
hewasthenabouttoreadtheseaccusations；tosuffersilentlytheabuseofallthosetongueswhichwereholdinghimuptoindignationortoscorn！liketheromanvictorinhistriumph；hehadtoenduretheinsultsofhimwhofollowedhiscar；relatingtothecrowdhisfollies；hisignorance；orhisvices。
but；amongthearrowsshotathimfromeveryside；wouldnoonebefoundpoisoned？wouldnotonereachsomespotinhisheartwherethewoundwouldbeincurable？whatistheworthofalifeexposedtotheattacksofenvioushatredorfuriousconviction？thechristiansyieldedonlythefragmentsoftheirfleshtothebeastsoftheamphitheatres；themaninpowergivesuphispeace；hisaffections；hishonor；tothecruelbitesofthepen。
whileiwasmusinguponthesedangersofgreatness；theusherenteredhastily。importantnewshadbeenreceived：theministerisjustsummonedtothecouncil；hewillnotbeabletotakehissisterstost。cloud。
isaw；throughthewindows；theyoungladies；whowerewaitingatthedoor；sorrowfullygoupstairsagain；whiletheirbrotherwentofftothecouncil。thecarriage；whichshouldhavegonefilledwithsomuchfamilyhappiness；isjustoutofsight；carryingonlythecaresofastatesmaninit。
theushercamebackdiscontentedanddisappointed。themoreorlessoflibertywhichheisallowedtoenjoy；ishisbarometerofthepoliticalatmosphere。ifhegetsleave；allgoeswell；ifheiskeptathispost；thecountryisindanger。hisopiniononpublicaffairsisbutacalculationofhisowninterest。myfriendisalmostastatesman。
ihadsomeconversationwithhim；andhetoldmeseveralcuriousparticularsofpubliclife。
thenewministerhasoldfriendswhoseopinionsheopposes；thoughhestillretainshispersonalregardforthem。thoughseparatedfromthembythecolorshefightsunder；theyremainunitedbyoldassociations；buttheexigenciesofpartyforbidhimtomeetthem。iftheirintercoursecontinued；itwouldawakensuspicion；peoplewouldimaginethatsomedishonorablebargainwasgoingon；hisfriendswouldbeheldtobetraitorsdesiroustosellthemselves；andhethecorruptministerpreparedtobuythem。hehas；therefore；beenobligedtobreakofffriendshipsoftwentyyearsstanding；andtosacrificeattachmentswhichhadbeeasecondnature。
sometimes；however；theministerstillgiveswaytohisoldfeelings；hereceivesorvisitshisfriendsprivately；heshutshimselfupwiththem；andtalksofthetimeswhentheycouldbeopenfriends。bydintofprecautionstheyhavehithertosucceededinconcealingthisblotoffriendshipagainstpolicy；butsoonerorlaterthenewspaperswillbeinformedofit；andwilldenouncehimtothecountryasanobjectofdistrust。
forwhetherhatredbehonestordishonest；itnevershrinksfromanyaccusation。sometimesitevenproceedstocrime。theusherassuredmethatseveralwarningshadbeengiventheministerwhichhadmadehimfearthevengeanceofanassassin；andthathenolongerventuredoutonfoot。
then；fromonethingtoanother；ilearnedwhattemptationscameintomisleadoroverehisjudgment；howhefoundhimselffatallyledintoobliquitieswhichhecouldnotbutdeplore。misledbypassion；over…persuadedbyentreaties；orpelledforreputationssake；hehasmanytimesheldthebalancewithanunsteadyhand。howsadtheconditionofhimwhoisinauthority！notonlyarethemiseriesofpowerimposeduponhim；butitsvicesalso；which；notcontentwithtorturing；succeedincorruptinghim。
weprolongedourconversationtillitwasinterruptedbytheministersreturn。hethrewhimselfoutofthecarriagewithahandfulofpapers；andwithananxiousmannerwentintohisownroom。aninstantafterwardhisbellwasheard；hissecretarywascalledtosendoffnoticestoallthoseinvitedfortheevening；theballwouldnottakeplace；theyspokemysteriouslyofbadnewstransmittedbythetelegraph；andinsuchcircumstancesanentertainmentwouldseemtoinsultthepublicsorrow。
itookleaveofmyfriend；andhereiamathome。whatihavejustseenisananswertomydoubtstheotherday。nowiknowwithwhatpangsmenpayfortheirdignities；nowiunderstandthatfortunesellswhatwebelieveshegives。
thisexplainstomethereasonwhycharlesvaspiredtothereposeofthecloister。
andyetihaveonlyglancedatsomeofthesufferingsattachedtopower。
whatshallisayofthefallsinwhichitspossessorsareprecipitatedfromtheheightsofheaventotheverydepthsoftheearth？ofthatpathofpainalongwhichtheymustforeverbeartheburdenoftheirresponsibility？ofthatchainofdecorumsandennuiswhichenpasseseveryactoftheirlives；andleavesthemsolittleliberty？
thepartisansofdespotismadherewithreasontoformsandceremonies。
ifmenwishtogiveunlimitedpowertotheirfellow…man；theymustkeephimseparatedfromordinaryhumanity；theymustsurroundhimwithacontinualworship；and；byaconstantceremonial；keepupforhimthesuperhumanparttheyhavegrantedhim。ourmasterscannotremainabsolute；exceptonconditionofbeingtreatedasidols。
but；afterall；theseidolsaremen；and；iftheexclusivelifetheymustleadisaninsulttothedignityofothers；itisalsoatormenttothemselves。everyoneknowsthelawofthespanishcourt；whichusedtoregulate；hourbyhour；theactionsofthekingandqueen；〃sothat；〃
saysvoltaire；〃byreadingitonecantellallthatthesovereignsofspainhavedone；orwilldo；fromphilipiitothedayofjudgment。〃itwasbythislawthatphilipiii；whensick；wasobligedtoenduresuchanexcessofheatthathediedinconsequence；becausethedukeofuzeda；whoalonehadtherighttoputoutthefireintheroyalchamber；happenedtobeabsent。
whenthewifeofcharlesiiwasrunawaywithonaspiritedhorse；shewasabouttoperishbeforeanyonedaredtosaveher；becauseetiquetteforbadethemtotouchthequeen。twoyoungofficersendangeredtheirlivesforherbystoppingthehorse。theprayersandtearsofherwhomtheyhadjustsnatchedfromdeathwerenecessarytoobtainpardonfortheircrime。everyoneknowstheanecdoterelatedbymadamecampanofmarieantoinette；wifeoflouisxvi。oneday；beingathertoilet；whenthechemisewasabouttobepresentedtoherbyoneoftheassistants；aladyofveryancientfamilyenteredandclaimedthehonor；asshehadtherightbyetiquette；but；atthemomentshewasabouttofulfilherduty；aladyofhigherrankappeared；andinherturntookthegarmentshewasabouttooffertothequeen；whenathirdladyofstillhighertitlecameinherturn；andwasfollowedbyafourth；whowasnootherthanthekingssister。thechemisewasinthismannerpassedfromhandtohand；withceremonies；courtesies；andpliments；beforeitcametothequeen；who；halfnakedandquiteashamed；wasshiveringwithcoldforthegreathonorofetiquette。
12th；sevenoclock；p。m鈥斺�攐ninghomethisevening；isaw；standingatthedoorofahouse；anoldman；whoseappearanceandfeaturesremindedmeofmyfather。therewasthesamebeautifulsmile；thesamedeepandpenetratingeye；thesamenoblebearingofthehead；andthesamecarelessattitude。
ibeganlivingoveragainthefirstyearsofmylife；andrecallingtomyselftheconversationsofthatguidewhomgodinhismercyhadgivenme；andwhominhisseverityhehadtoosoonwithdrawn。
whenmyfatherspoke；itwasnotonlytobringourtwomindstogetherbyaninterchangeofthought；buthiswordsalwayscontainedinstruction。
notthatheendeavoredtomakemefeelitso：myfatherfearedeverythingthathadtheappearanceofalesson。heusedtosaythatvirtuecouldmakeherselfdevotedfriends；butshedidnottakepupils：thereforehewasnotdesiroustoteachgoodness；hecontentedhimselfwithsowingtheseedsofit；certainthatexperiencewouldmakethemgrow。
howoftenhasgoodgrainfallenthusintoacorneroftheheart；and；whenithasbeenlongforgotten；allatonceputforththebladeandeintoear！itisatreasurelaidasideinatimeofignorance；andwedonotknowitsvaluetillwefindourselvesinneedofit。
amongthestorieswithwhichheenlivenedourwalksorourevenings；thereisonewhichnowreturnstomymemory；doubtlessbecausethetimeisetoderiveitslessonfromit。
myfather；whowasapprenticedattheageoftwelvetooneofthosetradingcollectorswhocallthemselvesnaturalists；becausetheyputallcreationunderglassesthattheymaysellitbyretail；hadalwaysledalifeofpovertyandlabor。obligedtorisebeforedaybreak；byturnsshop…boy；clerk；andlaborer；hewasmadetobearalone