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伊丽莎白·芭蕾特·勃朗宁致妹妹（2）
但是，越是怀疑他的人，将来就会越全面公正地评价他。我们可以耐心地等待你们的理解。可是此时，我真的太想告诉你们，他是怎样的一个人，他对我意味着什么——相信我，相信我说的话。他竭尽全力使我愉快，给我安慰……每当看到我心神不宁时，他便施展魅力哄我转而想
他……不管多少烦恼苦痛，他都能迫使我忘却它们，转而发笑——如果在奥尔良你们看到他那天的样子就好了。
他将我安置在床上，一连几个小时坐在我身旁，表现出无限的体贴与爱意，他答应，要借助上帝帮我赢回所有生我气的人的爱。他越来越爱我。到今天，我们已一起度过了两个星期，他深沉、真挚、柔情地对我说：“娶你之前我吻你的脚，我的芭——但现在我要亲吻你的脚印，我比以往更爱你。”这是真的，我能看到、感受到，我感到自己具有使他幸福的能力……我感到自己能把握住他。真奇怪，一个如此有才华的人居然会爱我——奇怪，但这是真的……我再也无法怀疑这一点。倘若不是一想起你们我就痛苦，那我们真的是幸福美满了。他的家人对我们不错。他父亲认为他已到了自行抉择的年龄，因此，并没干涉我们，只是在临走的时候说：“代我吻吻你的妻子。”他妹妹送了我一张可移动的写字桌，上面写着“赠伊·芭·勃，妹妹：萨里亚娜”。没人介意我们的沉默，因为他们知道其中缘由，这并不影响他对他们的感情和我对他们的尊重。
……
但是我想起……想起……想起那天晚上给你们带来的痛苦，我的，我的阿拉贝尔！我想起那天晚上就颤抖，我最亲爱、最亲爱的阿拉贝尔。噢，别以为新感情会取代旧感情。我想，我比以往更爱你们。罗伯特将在比萨给你们写信，也会给亨里埃塔写信的。他说他爱你们如同爱自己的姐妹，并希望你们能与我们在一起，盼望着你们与我们在一起的那一
天……一起生活，一起旅游，就像我现在所做的这样……
……你们感觉到了吗？你们知道吗？我……作为一个妻子……是世上最幸福的。他太好了，太深情了。他样样比我强。我们的爱不是日渐减少，而是在与日俱增。我之所以不写布尔什的天主教堂，而谈这些事情，是因为我确信，这是你们更想知道的。
我准备给父亲写信，很快也会给乔治写信。噢，亲爱的乔治如果充分了解我的心，就不会写那封信了。我知道他写那信是出于对我的爱，就如我感到他的信给我带来的痛苦一样。亲爱的乔治——他值得我怎么爱，我就会怎么去爱他。还有可怜的爸爸！我时时刻刻想着你们，永远不忘你们。亲爱的亨里埃塔、阿拉贝尔，让我像从前一样，并永远是
深深爱你们的
芭
1846年10月2日
（于罗阿纳）
Elizabeth Barrett Browning
To
（Roanne） October 2； 1846
Dear Sisters；
I thank and bless you my dearest Henrietta and Arabel—my own dearest kindest sisters！—what I suffered in reaching Orleans；—at last holding all these letters in my hands； can only be measured by my deep gratitude to you； and by the tears and kisses I spent upon every line of what you wrote to me… dearest kindest that you are。 The delay of the week in Paris brought me to the hour of my death warrant at Orleans—my ‘death warrant' I called it at the time； I was so anxious and terrified。 Robert brought in a great packet of letters… and I held them in my hands； not able to open one； and growing paler and colder every moment。 He wanted to sit by me while I read them； but I would not let him。 I had resolved never to let him do that； before the moment came—so； after some beseeching； I got him to go away for ten minutes； to meet the agony alone； and with more courage so； according to my old habit you know—And besides； it was right not to let him read…。 最好的txt下载网
伊丽莎白·芭蕾特·勃朗宁致妹妹（3）
They were very hard letters； those from dearest Papa and dearest George—To the first I had to bow my head—I do not seem to myself to have deserved that full cup； in the intentions of this act—but he is my father and he takes his own view； of course； of what is before him to judge of。 But for George； I thought it hard； I confess； that he should have written to me so with a sword。 To write to me as if I did not love you all；—I who would have laid down my life at a sign； if it could have benefited one of you really and essentially—with the proof； you should have had life and happiness at a sign。
It was hard that he should use his love for me to half break my heart with such a letter—Only he wrote in excitement and in ignorance。 I ask of God to show to him and the most unbelieving of you； that never； never did I love you better； all my beloved ones； than when I left you—than in that day； and that moment。
…
… My dearest； dearest Arabel！ Understand both of you； that if； from the apparent necessities of the instant； I consented to let the ceremony precede the departure by some few days； it was upon the condition of not seeing him again in that house and till we went away。
We parted； as we met； at the door of Marylebone Church—he helped me at the munion table； and not a word passed after。 I looked like death； he has said since。 You see we were afraid of a sudden removal preventing everything… or at least； laying the unpleasantness on me of a journey to London previous to the ceremony； which particularly I should have hated； for very obvious reasons。 There was no elopement in the case； but simply a private marriage； and to have given the least occasion to a certain class of observations； was repugnant to both of us… Wilson knew nothing till the night before。 What I suffered under your eyes； you may guess—it was in proportion to every effort successfully made to disguise the suffering。 Painful it is to look back upon now—forgive me for whatever was expiated in the deepest of my heart。
…
Did you get my long letter from Paris？ and Trippy； my short note from Havre。 Ah； dear Trippy！ let her not think hardly of me。 No one can judge of this act； except some one who knows thoroughly the man I have married。 He rises on me hour by hour。 If ever a being of a higher order lived among us with a glory round his head； in these latter days； he is such a being。
Papa thinks that I have sold my soul—for genius… mere genius。 Which I might have done when I was younger； if I had had the opportunity… but am in no danger of doing now。 For my sake； for the love of me； from an infatuation which from first to last has astonished me； he has consented to occupy for a moment a questionable position。
But those who question most； will do him justice fullest—and we must wait a little with resignation。 In the meanwhile； what he is； and what he is to me； I would fain teach you。—Have faith in me to believe it。 He puts out all his great faculties to give me pleasure and fort…charms me into thinking of him when he sees my thoughts wandering… forces me to smile in spite of nil of them—if you had seen him that day at Orleans。
伊丽莎白·芭蕾特·勃朗宁致妹妹（4）
He laid me down on the bed and sat by me for hours； pouring out floods of tenderness and goodness； and promising to win back for me； with God's help； the affection of such of you as were angry。 And he loves me more and more。 Today we have been together a fortnight； and he said to me with a deep； serious tenderness…“I kissed your feet； my Ba； before I married you—but now I would kiss the ground under your feet， I love you with a so much greater love。” And this is true； I see and feel。 I feel to have the power of making him happy… I feel to have it in my hands。 It is strange that anyone so brilliant should love me；—but true and strange it is…and it is impossible for me to doubt it any more。 Perfectly happy therefore we should be； if I could look back on you all without this pang。 His family have been very kind。 His father considered him of age to judge； and never thought of interfering otherwise than of saying at the last moment；“Give your wife a kiss for me” this； when they parted。 His sister sent me a little travelling writing desk； with a word written；“” Nobody was displeased at the reserve used towards them； understanding that there were reasons for it which did not detract from his affection for them and my respect。
…
But I think … think … of the suffering I caused you； my own； own Arabel； that evening！ I tremble thinking of you that evening—my own dearest dearest Arabel！ Oh； do not fancy that new affections ran undo the old。 I love you now even more； I think。 Robert is going to write to you from Pisa； and to Henrietta also。 He loves you as his sisters； he says； and wishes that you were with us； and hopes that one day you will be with us… staying and travelling with us…exactly as I do myself…
…
… And do you feel and know； that as for me… for my position as a wife…it is awfully happy for this world。 He is too good and tender； and beyond me in all things； and we love each other with a love that grows instead of diminishing。 I speak to you of such thing rather than of the cathedral at Bourges； because； it is of these； I feel sure； that you desire knowledge rather。
I am going to write to Papa—and to George—very soon； I shall。 Ah—dear George would not have written so； if he had known my whole heart； yet he loved me while he wrote； as I felt with every pain the writing caused me。 Dear George；—I love him to his worth。 And my poor Papa！ My thoughts cling to you all； and will not leave their hold。 Dearest Henrietta and Arabel let me be as ever and for ever
your fondly attached
Ba
。 最好的txt下载网
陀思妥耶夫斯基致兄长米哈依尔（1）
费奥多尔·陀思妥耶夫斯基（1821—1881）， 19世纪俄国伟大的小说家、思想家。在法国资产阶级革命思潮影响下，他早年曾醉心于空想社会主义，参加了彼得堡进步知识分子组织的彼得拉舍夫斯基小组的革命活动。1849年，陀思妥耶夫斯基被控阴谋叛国，判处死刑。临刑前一刻，收到沙皇的敕令，他被改判流放西伯利亚。这生与死之间的短短几秒给陀思妥耶夫斯基留下了不可磨灭的印象，之后他的作品一改往日风格，创作重点转向心理悲剧。他擅长心理剖析，尤其是揭示内心分裂，对人类肉体与精神痛苦的震撼人心的描写是其他作家无法企及的。他的矛盾性格组合、深层心理活动描写对后世作家产生了深远影响。
土街对面涅夫斯基广场涅士材德宅
米哈依尔·米哈依洛维奇·陀思妥耶夫斯基，
哥哥，我宝贵的朋友！事情都定下来了！我已经被宣判在要塞（我猜可能是奥伦斯基要塞）服四年苦役，然后去当列兵。今天，也就是12月22日，我们被押到了谢苗诺夫训练场。我们在那里听他们宣读了死刑判决书，又被要求亲吻了十字架，我们的宝剑在头顶上被折断，最后我们被换上了白衬衫。然后有三个人被绑缚在刑柱上等待行刑，我排在第六个。每次叫三个人，我在第二批，所以我离死亡最多只有一分钟了。
哥哥，我心里想起你和你的家人；在我临终前的那一刻，我心里想到的只有你，只有你一个人，那时候我才明白自己是多么地爱你啊，亲爱的哥哥！我还试着拥抱了站在我身旁的普列什耶夫和杜诺夫，并向他们说了再见。最后，忽然响起了撤退的号角，那些绑在行刑柱上的人被带了回来，然后，有人向我们宣布说沙皇陛下决定放我们一条生路，于是我们收到了现在的判决书。只有帕尔默被无罪释放了，回到军队里担任原来的职位。
亲爱的哥哥，我刚刚才被告知，我们今天或者明天就得出发。我提出想和你见一面，得到的回答是不可能，我能做的仅只是给你写这封信：请尽快回一封信给我吧。
我想你早已知道我们被判处了死刑。在被押往谢苗诺夫训练场的途中，我透过囚车的窗户看到很多围观的人群。也许你早已知晓了这消息，而且你一定很为我伤心。现在你看到了我的信，应该放下心了吧。
哥哥！我并没有垂头丧气或精神不振。生活无处不在，生活就在我们之间，而不在我们之外。永远有人在我周围，我要在人们中间做一个真正的“人”，要永远保持“人”的本色，无论面临什么样的不幸，我决不灰心，也决不倒下——生活就是这样的；生活的使命也是这样的。我已经意识到了这些，这种观念已经融入了我的血肉中。
……
请代我向大嫂和孩子们问好。为了让他们不要忘记我，请经常在他们面前提起我。我们将来还可能再见面呢！哥哥，请照顾好你自己和你的家人，希望你们平安而谨慎地生活下去，请多多考虑孩子们的前途……
……
哥哥，我们将来还可能有重逢之日！为了上帝的爱，请你一定要多多保重，好好活下去，直到我们再次相聚。将来总有一天我们还会紧紧拥抱，共同回想我们的青春时光、我们的黄金岁月、我们的理想希望，但此时此刻，我正把这一切从心中血淋淋地撕裂开来，并且把它们埋掉。
难道我将再也不能动手写作了吗？我想，四年之后，我很可能继续写作。我的上帝啊，如果我写了任何东西，我一定会把它们全都寄给你。啊！有多少存在于我脑海里的全新创作灵感将会凋谢，将会消失；或者；将作为一种毒素消融在我的血液里。是的，如果我不能写作的话，我一定会死掉的。最好是拿枝笔在监狱里待上十五年。。 最好的txt下载网
陀思妥耶夫斯基致兄长米哈依尔（2）
经常写信给我吧，要尽量写得详细些，要包括很多事实。不要忘了在每封信中都要写上家里所有的细节和琐事，这将带给我希望和活力。你可知道，在这个要塞里，你的来信有使我复活的力量！最近两个半月来，因为禁止写信和收信，我度过了一段非常难熬的时光……
……
如果我给任何人留有不好的记忆， 如果我同任何一个人争吵过，或者如果我给任何一个人造成了不愉快的印象，告诉他们忘掉这些吧——如果你能遇见他们的话。现在，我心里没有任何怨恨或者敌意，此时此刻，我应该拥抱我以前的每一位朋友，向他们表达深深的爱意。那是一种安慰，在今天临死之前； 向我亲爱的朋友说再见时，我亲自体验到了它……
……
当我回首过去，想到有那么多的时光已经白白荒废，有那么多的时间丧失在错觉、过失、懒散以及对于生活的无知中，那时我没有珍惜时间，也经常违背自己的心灵和精神——一想到这些，我的心就在流血。生命是一种恩赐，是一种幸福，我们每时每刻都应该生活在快乐之中。年轻人如果有经验该多好啊！现在，我的生命改变了，我获得了新生。哥哥！我向你发誓，我一定不会丧失希望，我一定保持精神与心灵的纯洁，我将获得一种更好的新生。那将是我全部的希望和所有的安慰！
狱中生活已经把我身上不够纯洁的物质欲望消灭殆尽。以前，我对自己不够注意，如今，艰难困苦对我已不算什么，因此，不要担心物质上的艰苦会把我折磨死。这是绝不可能的事！唉，要是我有健壮的体格就好了！
好，再见了，再见了，哥哥！让我紧紧地拥抱你，让我深情地亲吻你。请在心里记着我，不要伤心，不要悲痛。我恳求你，不要为我悲伤！在下一封信里，我将告诉你我是如何到那里去的。请记住我所告诉你的一�